Category Archives: #LifeGoals

Saying No Is A Strength- But Why Do People Have Trouble Saying No to Distractions?

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Daily writing prompt
How often do you say “no” to things that would interfere with your goals?
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In today’s world, we are constantly surrounded by distractions that attempt to pull us away from more meaningful pursuits. Take, for instance, technology such as our phones. Whenever we are faced with a task that we find uninteresting, the temptation to check social media may creep in. Perhaps a student scrolls through TikTok for several minutes before starting calculus homework, or a teacher feels the need to to check Pinterest before they begin grading essays. In reality, the task may only take a short period of time to complete, but still we allow small distractions to get in our way. This feeling is universal, but does it signal laziness, or is there a deeper meaning behind this phenomenon?

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According to McLean Hospital, there are several reasons why we might procrastinate. For some, it truly is a sense of laziness that, from time to time, causes us to lose motivation. Other times, there may be deep-rooted mental health problems that interfere with our ability to complete tasks. This includes, but is not limited to: anxiety, OCD, depression, and ADHD, just to name a few. What’s more is that procrastination can not only be a result of these mental health issues, but it can also be a cause of them as well. As people procrastinate, they have less time to accomplish whatever goals they have, which can then cause stress over time management.

The National Library of Medicine states that most people who procrastinate are between the ages of 14-29, and in another study, found that people between 18-25 have the greatest prevalence of mental illness. These statistics make even more sense when considering the especially high workload placed on people in this age group— college students attempting to manage rigorous academics along with anxiety around starting their new lives.

However, there is one positive to be considered. According to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), mental illnesses such as those linked to procrastination tend to peak around 18-25 and consistently decrease thereafter; a similar trend can be seen with procrastination.

Results from the 2010 NSDUH: Mental Health Findings, SAMHSA, CBHSQ

https://www.samhsa.gov/data/sites/default/files/NSDUHmhfr2010/NSDUHmhfr2010.htm

Procrastination scores across the life span according to sex. Note:... | Download Scientific Diagram

https://www.researchgate.net/figure/Procrastination-scores-across-the-life-span-according-to-sex-Note-Post-hoc-analyses_fig5_294257227

So, given this information, what can we take away from this? I believe this shows that we must be kinder to ourselves, even when we have trouble saying “no” to something that’s on our to-do lists. If we continually struggle to complete a certain task, it may be worthwhile to examine the underlying emotions that it brings us and address those feelings before we move forward. As always, we must strive to be better, not perfect.

Life-Changing Habits To Pick Up For This New Year

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An article by Brown University Health states that good habits are exceptionally beneficial to people’s daily lives through efficiency, consistency, goal achievement, health and wellness, time management, skill development, and even stress reduction (“Why Habits Can Be a Good Thing”). This conception emphasizes the importance of good habits and implies that good habits result in a better life. Thus, it is important to implement positive habits that can change your life for the better in 2025. 

With the upbringing of the era of technology, planet Earth transformed significantly and people started to depend on technology for their daily use. Although this global transformation had some positive impacts, one of its negative impacts is the amount of time lost by humans in their life due to technology. This means that as humans became reliant on technology, their time started to be consumed by it, especially on social media apps like TikTok and Instagram where it created an endless cycle of addictive scrolling, which resulted in teens using their phones before they go to sleep and right when they wake up.  Although this may seem relaxing, it transformed lots of people, specifically teens, through the incorporation of this bad habit into their daily life. In order to prevent your time from being further wasted, then you should start implementing this in your routines. You should go on your phone and put restrictions on your phone for the time you wake up and before you go to sleep in order to prevent yourself from going on your phone. You can also distract yourself with other things. For example, you can listen to energetic music instead of scrolling on social media. 

Another habit that can be a head start for a great life in 2025 is to meditate. Many people’s lives drastically change due to meditation and studies from Harvard state that mindfulness makes positive changes to physical and mental well-being (Powell). If meditation is incorporated into your daily life as a habit, then by the end of 2025, your life will definitely have changed for the better.

Lastly, another habit you can begin is sleeping the right amount of times. I can not stress this enough but getting enough is so important to your health. It can impact your mood and how you act. Sleeping the right amount of sleep can improve your mood and your energy. If you don’t get enough sleep, you’ll all be grouchy and tired. If you get enough sleep, you will be in a way better mood. 

In conclusion, the three habits to implement in 2025 are not getting screen time when you wake up and before you sleep, which prevent the loss of time, meditation for your physical and mental well being, and getting enough sleep, which is extremely important for your health in general. Implementing these 3 habits might seem small but their impact is drastic. Thus, you can make 2025 a year of growth step by step with these habits.

Taking A Step Back

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The soft scrape of a page being turned in my newest book is what brings me happiness.

Too often are we, as humans in the 21st century, focused on attaining a goal or possession that we have glorified in our minds. Admittedly, I used to (and probably still am, to some degree) like this, but I realized during my junior year of high school that this was an insatiable pursuit.

During my junior year of high school, I was obsessed with keeping my grades up. I would stay up until 3 am studying for a math test that I had the next day or spend hours perfecting a paper for a class in which I already had a 97%. I would spend 20 minutes on a drawing and rush to finish it if I couldn’t get it done because I would start to grow tired of it. I would start a new video game in an attempt to get a “perfect playthrough” and then drop it as soon as I did. In doing these things, I realized that I wasn’t pursuing a genuine feeling of enjoyment out of them- rather, I was chasing the immediate gratification I would feel from their completion.

As I reached the end of my junior year, I realized that I was happy, in part from these things, but for the most part, I couldn’t put my finger on exactly what made life so great. Was it that I had gotten an A in my math class? That I had gotten that internship or won that award? Something told me no. It was the day-to-day victories that should have been insignificant, most of which I had already forgotten which made life so great. It was the inside jokes my friends and I would cry from laughing at during lunch. It was the random FaceTime I would get from a friend I hadn’t seen in forever or an old photo that would hit me with a wave of nostalgia.

It was going to the bookstore with my Omi to check out a new book, hearing stories from her during the whole car ride there. As we entered the store I soaked in the soothing scent of books and felt perfectly content. I weaved through the aisles trying to find the book I wanted, and clutching it like a prize, would bring it up to the checkout counter. I opened it as soon as I got home, eager to see what adventures I had missed out on during the time between this installment and the last. And so I turn the next page and breathe a sigh of contentment knowing that this is what brings me happiness.

Learning a New Language

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Learning a new language can be very beneficial, but it can also be one of the most challenging endeavors. When I had to fulfill my high school graduation requirements by taking Spanish this summer, it was quite tough. I decided to take my Spanish class at my local community college because my school offers dual enrollment for the summer. I could provide more details about this whole experience, but that would take a long time.

Honestly, it was worth it because now I got it out of the way, but I was so bad at all of it that I had to contact a lot of my Spanish-speaking friends to help me. It was a difficult couple of weeks, I will admit.

Writing about that experience also helped me get introduced to the fact that learning a new language so late in life is very difficult, I mean usually when we get good at something, most of us start off young. An example would be that I have been dancing since I was a kid, I practiced a lot and went to classes but at the same time, I honed that and now I can confidently say that I can dance.

Speaking another language is a similar concept. I must admit, people my age who know more than just one language are impressive! But then I remember that it’s never too late to learn something new. I know that if I truly try hard enough, I can fully learn another language. All I need is the right mindset and the proper resources.

Rethinking my New Year Resolutions

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Can you believe it’s already a couple of months into 2024? If you like me and have a list of New Year resolutions to accomplish this year, you will understand what I’m going through. Reflecting on the resolutions I set for myself at the beginning of the year, I’m disappointed. 

As a teen, I’m no stranger to the ebb and flow of enthusiasm that comes with goal-setting. At midnight on New Year’s Eve, I was excited, armed with a list of resolutions I was convinced would transform my life, maybe just a little.

Yet, as the days turned into weeks and the weeks into months, that initial spark of determination began to flicker. School assignments piled up, extracurricular activities demanded more of my time, and the daily grind of teenage life overshadowed my lofty aspirations.

It wasn’t until recently that I took a step back to reassess where I stood with my resolutions. Sitting down with my journal, I flipped through the pages, revisiting the goals I had written down with such fervor months ago. Some seemed laughably unrealistic now, while others felt attainable with some recalibration.

One resolution that stood out to me was my commitment to prioritize self-care. I neglected my well-being in the craziness of school, friends, and obligations. Late nights cramming for exams had become the norm, and exercise had taken a backseat to whatever needed to be done. I realized I needed to prioritize self-care to thrive and not just survive.

So, I started small. I set a bedtime for myself and stuck to it religiously, no matter how tempting it was to stay up late scrolling through social media. I put time into my schedule for exercise, whether going for a run or practicing yoga in my bedroom. Most importantly, I learned to say no to activities that drained me mentally and emotionally, choosing instead to spend my time on things that brought me joy, fulfillment, and a bit of relaxation.

Another resolution that needed a bit of tweaking was my goal to improve my grades. While aiming for straight A’s sounded impressive in theory, the reality was that I was spreading myself too thin trying to excel in every subject. Instead, I focused on critical areas where I could improve significantly. I sought extra help from teachers, formed study groups with classmates, and adopted better time management strategies to stay on top of my assignments.

Reflecting on my journey over the past few months, I realize that the key to success lies not in grandiose gestures or sweeping declarations but in our small, everyday choices. It’s about showing up for ourselves, even when it’s hard, and adapting and evolving as we grow. So here I am, rekindling the flame of my New Year’s resolutions, armed with a newfound sense of purpose and determination to make the most of the rest of this year. I hope you also rethink your New Year resolution so it brings you the joy of a little victory every day.

If you need help starting or know what to do with a healthy way to set goals and resolve them, I invite you to check out some of these books from the Library.

Total Teen, Tracy Anderson’s Guide to Health, Happiness and Ruling Your World.

You, the Owner’s Manual for Teens

A Guide to A Healthy Body and Happy Life

The Secret to Teen Power by Harrington, Paul

The Self-esteem Habit for Teens

50 Simple Ways to Build Your Confidence Every Day by Schab, Lisa M.

Here’s to everyday victory!

Bella H

Next Year Jitters

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Whether you’re going into high school, Junior year, or Senior year, then obviously it’s going to be scary. As a sophomore who is going into Junior year, there are so many nerves that are just happening all at once. Especially now that you have to try harder in your academics for potential colleges and careers. One thing I’m glad I know though is that I’m not going through this whole feeling alone, so it gives me that sense of comfort. I asked a lot of my friends these questions about what they’re going to be doing for their classes next year and every response I get makes it seem like they have it all figured out, which I have to admit, I’m a bit jealous of.

It’s not that I know what I’m walking into next year in terms of academic courses, but it also runs down to the fact of how I’m going to handle it. One thing I tend to notice about myself is that I don’t know how to handle pressure, which is a skill I desperately need to work on, but at the same time, how does that benefit me for next year? Because I know that this year (or whatever grade you’re in now) determines a good portion of your life. I know everyone has their way of coping with certain situations, but there would also be a lot of doubt when I feel the walls closing in. Maybe it’s because of fight or flight reaction..?

I know a lot of schools right now are getting out for the summer right now, but thinking about next year kind of makes you think in a new light. How everything in your school career has gone into this very moment of now. Moving into the next grade and all that good stuff, embracing new and old peers, learning new subjects, it all seems a bit surreal. I could probably just be ranting here but the whole moving up to another level of school is very dawning, it just occurred to me that I’m entering junior year next year and mentally, I am not ready in the slightest.

But, I also think about the new things I will be enduring too, because high school is an experience that you can experiment with both the good and the bad at the same time, so it gives that good reflection too! I would say I’ve enjoyed these past two years so far, and it’s also nice to know that I’m in the same boat with a lot of people too. It’s sad but true, school does get harder as you go, but the only way we can actually persevere through the trials and tribulations is just to dive in head first and put in the work to make it all worth it.

Together4Teens on April 13

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Join the library, the City of Mission Viejo, and other local groups for this great event for teens and their parents!

Earn community service credit while attending valuable workshops. There will be a resource fair plus a complimentary lunch. Don’t miss the guest speaker, Larissa May!

For more details, see the program here.

SMART Goals!

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The first month of the new year, 2024, comes to an end but it is still not too late to make 2024 resolutions! Goals are hard to set and achieve especially if it’s hard for you to commit to long-term stuff, but using SMART can help you achieve the goals for 2024 whether it be to lose weight, get better grades, or even start meditating. So what does SMART stand for?

S – Specific

The S in SMART means “specific.” This means that your goal has to be specific and it can not be broad. You can be more specific with your goal by using the 5 W’s: who, where, what, and why. You can also use how in this when making your goal. An example of being specific is instead of saying,“My goal is to get better grades,” you can say “My goal is to turn my grades from C’s to A’s for the second semester of high school.”

M – Measurable

The M in SMART means “measurable.” This means that your goal has to be measurable. By being measurable, it means that you can track your progress. If your goal was to lose weight, you could track your weight on a scale at the end of each week. 

A –  Attainable

The A in SMART means “attainable.” This means that your goal should be attainable and not impossible. You can state how this goal is attainable. For example, if your goal is to start getting a better sleeping schedule, you can eliminate some distractions, such as going on your device before you sleep, so the goal is attainable. 

R – Realistic

The R in SMART means “realistic.”This means that you should be realistic in making your goal and that it can be achieved within the amount of time. Ask yourself questions such as “How will I complete this goal by the end of the year?” so that you can be realistic with making your goals. 

T – Timely

The T in SMART means “timely.” This means how you will time your progress. You can time your progress in various ways such as writing down in your planner every week or daily to achieve your goal. For timely, you have to write down how you’re going to time your progress. An example of this could be that you will read 2 books to 5 more books than last year by December 31st, 2024. 

This is really helpful and I apologize if my explanation was not clear enough but this has helped me a lot. I had to make a goal for my English class and although I was obligated to do the assignment, it actually is really helpful for I have stayed consistent with my goals for the new year. So if you really want to be productive and achieve goals for 2024, I recommend using the SMART method.

“Marie Kondoing” Your Room

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Now, I am going to assume that not everyone knows who Marie Kondo is. Marie Kondo is a Japanese woman who has various TV shows and books about organization. My mother, along with many other moms, has watched one of her shows at one point or another. So when I talk about ¨Marie Kondoing¨ my room, I mean cleaning and organizing my room. Even though, and I will admit, I don’t particularly like cleaning/organizing in my free time, I did when I was super bored one day. The results of my cleaning, I am extremely happy about. So here are the pros of cleaning my room:

  • Less cluttered. It doesn’t feel suffocating to be in my room.
  • More space. There is more space for future items, and just space. The space is so nice to have in a room.
  • Getting rid of stuff. I found so much stuff in my room that I honestly have no idea was there. I found the container of an old marker making machine, a rock, empty paint tubes and a 3D pen. Random stuff. 
  • Finding things that I like. I found a pair of new(ish) shoes from my mother and a coil of LED lights.
  • Decorating. I used the stuff I found to decorate my closet and my desk

AND FINALLY

  • It makes me feel more calm and mature. My room feels lighter and it makes me feel less anxious. It makes me feel more chill.

The method I used to clean my room was the Marie Kondo way, which involves feelings. What you do is hold up each item and ask yourself, ¨Does this bring me joy? Does it have a purpose or a reason?¨ Doing this, I realized how much stuff I had that was useless and brought me no joy whatsoever. 

My now clean room makes me feel ready for the school year and all the stress that comes with it. I really recommend cleaning your room for a less cluttered mind and a more calm mindset. 

Books by Marie Kondo are available to check out from the Mission Viejo Library. It is also available to download for free from Libby.